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Articles for Moms is written by Lori Radun, , Certified Life Coach and founder of True To You Life Coaching
To learn more click HERE
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Family and Parenting
November 2006 – The Key that Opens the Door to Extraordinary Families
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 The holiday
season tends to be a popular time to overeat. Not only is it not
healthy for us, but we always regret it later. Mastering Food
is an excellent self-study course, written by Dr. Roger Gould,
a psychiatrist with over 30 years experience working with overweight
individuals. This 12 week course is designed to help you conquer
emotional eating and stop the never ending cycle of yo-yo diets.
Start the course now so you are equipped to tackle the temptations
of holiday overeating.
For a FREE
trial, click on the button. |
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 We’ve started
a new game in our home. Each night at the dinner table we each
take turns asking another family member a question about himself.
“So, Rick, how are you feeling about your interview on Monday?”
“Mom, what do you want for Christmas?” Sounds like just a normal
conversation, right? Well, there is a purpose to our game. We
have two introverted boys who struggle with social skills. This
game was created to better teach them how to communicate and take
interest in other people’s lives. As adults, we are all required
to be able to start a conversation with a new person or communicate
our concern for the important people in our lives.
What is this
new game we play called? There is no formal name, but this game
is a family ritual, and family rituals help you create extraordinary
families. According to the Webster’s Dictionary, a ritual is “any
formal, customary, or ceremonial observance, practice or procedure”.
Family rituals help define who your family is. Every family has
a different way of doing things and your children will come to
identify certain rituals as special, and they will begin to differentiate
themselves from other families. Family rituals provide comfort
and security. Think of the child that follows the same ritual
every night before bed. Mom or Dad helps her get ready for bed.
They read 3 books, talk about their day and end the evening with
bedtime prayers. This child comes to expect this routine every
night and this very ritual is what provides the trust that is
needed between parent and child.
Family rituals
build family bonds. My two boys have a special handshake they
engage in to demonstrate their love for one another. It’s too
complicated for parents, so we don’t even try to learn it. You
can count on family rituals to generate a lot of wonderful family
memories. I very clearly remember, as a child, going every Sunday
to the donut shop with my parents. We would pick up our donuts
and then go park in a parking lot somewhere. I would sit in the
backseat eating my donut while my parents read the newspaper in
the front seat. Now, it might seem like a strange ritual, but
even today, as an adult, having a donut on Sundays brings back
special memories. Lastly, family rituals can be used to teach
values and practical skills. Without even knowing it, having a
family game night is teaching your children patience, cooperation,
and good sportsmanship.
There are five
major purposes for family rituals:
1. Family rituals
are used to celebrate something. Rituals during the holidays
are probably the most popular kind of ritual. Most families have
a certain ritual they go through that helps them celebrate Christmas,
birthdays, Thanksgiving, Cinco de Mayo, and other special dates.
But what about celebrating the first day of Spring, the last day
of school, golden birthdays, or report card day? The possibilities
are endless.
2. Family rituals
can be used to smooth transitions and change. When it was
time for my younger son to give up his pacifier, we introduced
the “Paci Fairy”. We told him the Paci Fairy was going to come
at night to take all his pacifiers and leave him a special toy.
My son never asked for his pacifiers after that night. We all
go through change in life, and family rituals can make those times
of change exciting and normal. Consider introducing rituals for
potty training, new births, 1st period for girls, 1st shave for
boys, new drivers, and graduations.
3. Another
purpose for family rituals is to solve a problem. There
are always family problems that need to be solved. Weekly family
meetings are an excellent way to address those problems. Consider
having chore rituals to increase family cooperation. I know of
families that will go through a silly ritual when their child
is having a temper tantrum.
4. Family rituals
should be used to help family members connect with one another.
Mealtime and bedtime rituals are excellent ways to connect. Introducing
family fun nights on a regular basis generates closeness. My older
son and I have a special way we say “I Love You”. It is a hand
signal we use that no one else understands. Connection in your
family is critical to creating an extraordinary family.
5. Family rituals
are great for teaching skills and values. One great way
to introduce values into your home is to create a “Value of the
Month” program. Decide what your top 12 values are for your family
and assign that value to a month. For instance, February is a
great time to teach the value love, and November is perfect for
thankfulness or gratitude. Incorporate special rituals each month
that teach those values. Reading books, playing games, doing a
family community project, and watching movies that pertain to
that value are great ways to reinforce what you want your children
to learn.
Think about
the family rituals you already engage in. What rituals would be
good to add to your family to create happier and closer relationships?
What problems in your family need to be addressed, and how might
you add a ritual to help with them? What changes or special days
do you want to celebrate in your family? To get you started, I
recommend having one solid ritual of connection daily. Create
one modest weekly family ritual, and work in a monthly family
ritual as well. Celebrate at least one family ritual for major
holidays and birthdays. Remember, the purpose of creating family
rituals is to equip your children with the skills and values you
want them to learn, great family relationships, and wonderful
family memories. |
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 I am thrilled
to announce my newest product ~ The Self Esteem Series.
This eBook
series is not just for women that struggle with low self esteem,
but also for anyone who finds it challenging to engage in self-love.
Volumes 1 and 2 are now being released, with Volumes 3-8 to be
released at a later date. The first two volumes will help you:
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 Lori
Radun, CEC is a certified life coach and founder of True to You
Life Coaching, LLC. Through speaking, personal coaching,
her FREE monthly newsletter, and other coaching products, Lori’s
desire is to offer encouragement and support for moms on their
journey through motherhood. Her mission is to inspire and help
moms reduce stress, focus on what’s important to them, and be
who God designed them to be so they can have the peaceful and
happy family lives they want.
Take our FREE
coaching quiz or call 630-236-7142 for a FREE coaching session
to see if coaching is for you.
Since coaching
is conducted over the telephone or by email, no client is too
far away! |
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Have a wonderful month!
Lori Radun, CEC True to You Life Coaching, LLC
phone:
(630) 236-7142
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True to You Life Coaching™
Phone: (630) 236-7142 Email: lori@true2youlifecoaching.com |